Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
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When Chuck Norris farts, the weather changes.
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Chuck Norris is the only man who has ever defeated a brick wall in a game of Badminton.
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Chuck Norris has the ability to build a snowman even out of rain.
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Superman owns a pair of Chuck pajamas.
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The only time Chuck Norris was wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.
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Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris prefers killing.
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Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone also.
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Ronaldo can throw a football over 50 yards. Chuck Norris can throw Ronaldo even further.
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A judge dropped the charges of attempt to murder on Chuck Norris, as he knew that the latter does not "attempt" murder.
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The gloomiest moment for a child is not when he learns that Santa Claus isn't real, it's when he learns that Chuck Norris is.
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Some people go swimming with dolphins, Chuck Norris swims with sharks.
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When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe. He requests a hand gun and a bucket.
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Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
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In an average living room, there are 2112 objects Chuck Norris can use to kill you, including the room itself.
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Blood test revelation: Chuck Norris's Blood Type is AK-56.
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Chuck Norris' cat is trained to pick up his own poop. This is because he does not take shit from anyone.
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The best hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.
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Sylvester Stallone was taken as Rocky because Chuck Norris was on vacation.
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Real men wear yellow. Chuck Norris wears blood.
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Ghosts exist because Chuck Norris kills people faster than Death can process them.
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