 I am always ready to learn, but I do not always like being taught.  - Winston Churchill |
I don?t want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it by not dying. - Woody Allen |
Humor is just another defense against the universe. - Mel Brooks |
Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success. - Jim Backus |
I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters. - Frank Lloyd Wright |
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception. - Groucho Marx |
Get well cards have become so humorous that if you don't get sick you're missing half the fun. - Flip Wilson |
Doctors are the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too. - Anton Chekhov |
Intelligence is like a four-wheel drive. It allows you to get stuck in more remote places. - Garrison Keillor |
It matters not whether you win or lose; what matters is whether I win or lose. - Darrin Weinberg |
I wanted to kill the hottest person on Earth. Then I learned that there were laws against suicide. - Missy Fruchter |
There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot. - Steven Wright |
The fellow who thinks he knows it all is especially annoying to those of us who do. - Harold Coffin |
Behind every successful woman...is a substantial amount of coffee. - Stephanie Piro |
If you don't know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else! - Yogi Berra |
There are many humorous things in the world: among them the white man's notion that he is less savage than the other savages. - Mark Twain |
It is generally agreed that "Hello" is an appropriate greeting because if you entered a room and said "Goodbye," it could confuse a lot of people. - Dolph Sharp |
If you're going to make every game a matter of life or death, you're going to have a lot of problems. For one thing, you'll be dead a lot. - Dean Smith |
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something. - Author Unknown |
The best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it. - Harry Truman |
Every man is a fool for at least five minutes every day; wisdom consists in not exceeding the limit. - Elber Hubbard |
I sold my house this week. I got a pretty good price for it, but it made my landlord mad as hell. - Garry Shandling |
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman! - Author Unknown |
Baby Quotes